We all have that one person that we have to struggle to deal with or try to tolerate. It usually is all about them. They need to be the center of attention. They are loud over talkers that have to be heard and always have to have the last word.

Even worse is that they are certainly extroverts and sometimes psychic vampires that suck the air and energy right out of the room. They always need to be right and will not accept responsibility for nothing.

They are most often passive aggressive. Instead of bringing up a topic of concern, they will post something on social media knowing that everyone will see it.

If they are a member of our family we cringe when they text us, or even worse when they feel the need to call. They could be someone in our social circle. What do you these folks? Well, the best answer is to keep your distance and your wits. Be polite, firm yet courteous.

However, what if you work with that person? We spend a lot of time at work and with that Toxic Apple. Apple because as the saying goes – there is one in every bunch. In addition, Toxic because if we are not careful we can allow ourselves to absorb their toxicity and become like them and become our worst self.

These people can ruin our day if we let them. We have three options- 1. Accept our fate and deal. 2. Try to change the person or situation (where you run the risk of becoming the problem) 3. Find another place to work. All these are challenges that will vary in energy and resources that will be disrupted in either dollars or sick days or mental health days.

Alternatively, we could use our daily encounters to work on our mental toughness. Look at it as a workout. You really need to stretch those mental muscles, the old heart muscles and our patience that in the end will make us better spouses, parents, and relatives. I am not advocating self-torture but a measured response to a difficult situation. We have the power over our thoughts and feelings but not over the situation.

Perhaps that rotten apple is unhappy or is struggling with who knows what and they are casting their shadow out into the world and need our help. Do not take what they do, say personally. Perhaps we are not behaving our best. A self-awareness check to see if we are spreading any of our toxins because have some.

Rise above. Be strong. Be Kind. Be patient. Do your best. Go for walk. Reset. Reboot. Find your center. Be your best.

In the spirit of truth