BY: JEFF S TURNBUL
Before we can shine our light forth unto the world – we have got to know ourselves, accept ourselves, come to love ourselves, heal our being and take major steps toward wholeness so that we are ready to give back and close the rift and eliminate any perceived separation.
We, of course, can work on all these five conducts simultaneously as we work through the process but the focus on the order will deliver us to our intended outcome – Alchemy for Global Transformation. But, before we can change the world we must change ourselves. We can, of course, do our best as we traverse through this experiment thru life and do what we can as we clean out our store house of shadows, specters, and phantoms from our past.
While we are routing around in the darkness we will find the treasure that we can bring back to the ordinary world, our reality and be able to apply that long forgotten gift, skill, interest or perspective that we thought was best left in the murky nether regions of our being – lest someone we love, trust, respect think less of us. For me it was my creative, artist side. I left that and pretended to be a titan of Wall Street when all I wanted to do was roam around the country like a modern-day troubadour and tell stories and entertain. I thought my father might love me and show me affection if I made a lot of money and that would make him proud of me. So much time spent trying to appease someone who I did not even know. Later when he attended one of my shows he was blown away and astounded at my talent. I finally received what I wanted so much, but it was on my terms in my space and time.
I still struggle giving myself permission to follow my muse. She is my muse to follow no one else’s. And, she wants me to follow her. Why wouldn’t I? We are all much more creative then we give ourselves credit for. We must not hide our light or love. We must share it with the world no matter what it is, we must offer what we have and be glad in the giving. We feel and heal when we are helping others. When I struggled with depression, I visited a mental ward at a hospital and would sing and play for the patients. Little did I know that years later I would be one of them, at least mentally, physically and spiritually. I was not able to commit to being committed. So, I struggled and hid in plain sight as I suffered.
It has been a long road, but I can tell you that if we don’t give up and we work with the light and dark forces within us we can move mountains and turn the tide of anything that may befall us. We are stronger together. If we can love, accept and forgive we can heal so that we all can share because we genuinely care and move humanity forward so that we can solve and evolve and become the divine beings that we truly, completely and holistically are.
ONWARDS, INWARDS & UPWARDS…