Alchemy & Transformation

 

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Alchemy is the lost art of Transformation.  The Alchemists of old believed that since lead and gold contained the same elements – Earth, Fire, Water and Air that the base element of lead could be Transformed and Transmuted into the higher metal-Gold.

On a Metaphorical level, this could apply to Humankind.  If the least of US wants to become the best a person could be, WE have everything we need to Transform, Change the leaden nature of hatred, depression, anger into the golden impulse within the US to work to achieve the golden nature of self-actualization and self-realization.

You have no doubt heard numerous times that life is a – Process.  It is, it takes the time it takes self-awareness, determination, self-discipline, compassion, and above all else – Love.  It takes love for oneself and for the fellowship of Humankind.

When I was young, I never would have imagined what turbulent times would lay ahead, and the direction my life would take.  For all I knew, I was a normal kid.  Concerned with what life brought one day at a time not really considering anything too far off other than the next party or swim meet.  Little did I know that the road that was before me would be a rocky, twisted, strange trip invariably leading to depression, suicidal tendencies, heights of creativity and bliss and at times a tempered madness?

As I began to reach adulthood and struggled with what is expected of a man I had a very difficult time finding my way.  My mind and temperament were quixotic and volatile.  I had no attention span.  My mind raced from one brilliant idea to the next.  Looking back at those times, I now realize that I did not believe I would live past twenty-one years of age, so I did not want to invest too much time.  I wanted to leave my mark and go out on top.

I never invested a lot of time in anything but my suffering.  I invested plenty of energy and passion then I would fail and then crash and burn and then on to the next big thing.  I was a gifted swimmer and musician, but my strengths and my talents were not encouraged, acknowledged or utilized.  I know now that my father had a feeling that something was not right with his second son and placating him with temporary tactics would be easy and cheaper than a long time strategy.

I joke that I was raised by wolves.  I was not of course, but I pretty much came and went as I pleased and did what I wanted unbeknownst to my parents.  I started drinking and smoking pot when I was eleven.  I was not a bad kid per se, but I was alone and vulnerable and very impressionable.  Nevertheless, I managed.  I got by and was in my own little world.

In essence, I never grew up.  Later I would be diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Depression and told that I had a one in five chance of survival due to a high percentage of people with the same diagnose committing suicide.  The first Psychiatrist that diagnosed me said that it was treatable and that could be managed as if I had diabetes.  He said that I would have it for life and that there was no cure.

He was wrong.  It was explained to me that it was a chemical imbalance in my brain.  Well, I understood the nature of imbalance and thought if something can become imbalanced that it could also be rebalanced.

My journey involves healing and a quest for wholeness and wellbeing.  It was not easy but I am here to tell that it is possible.  This is why I have nicknamed myself the –

AGENT OF CHANGE.

“There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth, not finishing and never starting.” Start, Now Won’t You? I Will Be Your Guide.

JEFF S TURNBULL

3 thoughts on “Alchemy & Transformation

  1. Greetings, Jeff. I miss you, old friend, and I hope you’re doing well. Allow me to friendly engage you on your thoughts here. You began by stating what alchemist believed, without ever verifying whether alchemy as a whole is a substantiated system and philosophy, and then apply it metaphorically to a belief system about oneself. My question is this: how do you know what you believe about oneself is actually true? How do you justify this worldview? How do you know that the path to transformation actually is possible from within oneself? Have you considered the possibility that it is not?

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    1. Hello, Nathan.
      As to what it is, it is a way of life. It is taught by way of allegory, metaphor, and symbolism. It is not be taken literally as of turning lead to gold. I know that it works because I have lived it. If it works it must be true thus if it can work for me and can work for the least of us. I know that it is possible because as someone who contemplated suicide daily and knows hell on earth due to extreme mental illness, and self-inflicted suffering and self-loathing can climb out of the ashes continuously to eventually realize self-love, unconditional love, peace of mind and wellness of body that I am a living testament of health and vitality. I did consider that it was not possible right up until I knew that it was. It was a crucible, a turning point. I can and have achieved this thru will and perseverance with the faith and the knowledge that I am loved and worthy of love. And, All is Love. It is all humanly possible without any divine interference.

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